Children’s Theatre Co. TEEN AUDITIONS Fatebook: a Cyberspace Ghost Story, directed by Whit MacLaughlin Fatebook will be a theatre production that takes place in both cyberspace and in live-space in 2009. The play is being produced by CTC and New Paradise Laboratories of Philadelphia. It will be created, in part, by its performers between October 2008 and the run in Fall 2009. Workshops are in Oct08, Jan09, Mar09, and Jun09. First rehearsal in Jul09. Premieres in Philadelphia Aug09, returns to Minneapolis in Sep09 and runs at CTC Oct-Nov09. WHO: Only high school sophmores and juniors, boys and girls. We’re looking for actors, musicians, composers, choreographers, filmmakers, and all-around interesting people. AUDITIONS: Prepare 30-second original piece that tells us something about yourself. It can be music, song, dance, monologue, video, or other anything else of your choosing. Please post your video on YouTube with the following title: FATEBOOK AUDITION–. When your video is uploaded, send an email to companymanager@childrenstheatre.org with your contact information. CALL Nancy at 612-872-5141 for more details.

Children’s Theatre Co. YOUTH AUDITIONS Iqbal, directed by Artistic Director Peter C. Brosius This new play is inspired by the true story of the life and work of child-activist Iqbal Musih. A world premiere, the play tells the story of the struggles of child workers in a Pakistani rug factory. We are looking for boys and girls ages 10-16 who are Pakistani, East Indian, Iranian, Asian, or from other countries in that geographic region. First Rehearsal: 1/27/09 Opening: 3/6/09 Closing: 4/4/09 PREPARE: No preparation is neccessary. We will do cold reading from the script. AUDITIONS: Monday, 10/6/08 @ 4:00-6:00 pm at CTC. Please call Nancy at 612-872-5141 for more details and to schedule your audition appointment. EOE/AA

Park Square Theatre I have before…Rwanda by Sonja Linden. AEA+NON. Auds 10/6 6:30p-8:30p. Reh 3/31/09. Day & evening performances run 5/1/09-5/17/09. Dir Warren Bowles 1M 40s. Appt 10/1, 10a-12p & 10/2, 8:30-9:30, call 651-767-8491 Info. parksquaretheatre.org

ENTERTAINERS WANTED DEJA VU NIGHT CLUB Immediate start. no contests. no dance exp nec. Indep contractor status. FT/PT. Must be 18yrs. 315 Washington Ave N. Mpls. Call 612-333-6333

You’re A Good Man, Charlie Brown Youth Performance Company aud 10/7, ages 13-30. Non-stipend 612-623-9180 for appt.

FALL ACTING WORKSHOP With REGGIE PHOENIX phoenixtheaterworks.org

CASTING for 2 student films, 10/4, 10-3pm MCTC. Contact 612-359-9314.

Today, I’m recovering from Monday night’s Twin Cities Theatre Prom. I’m sure you’re super surprised to hear that I found much of this event to be stupid. And not even just normal stupid…I’m talking I-put-my-dick-in-a-bee-hive stupid. The following are just a few of the things that made my head explode.

• No Categories/Nominees – This is, by far, the most moronic aspect of the Iveys. The claim is that with nominees, there are losers. And the Iveys are not a competition. But with the inclusion of nominees, the Iveys would be able to give recognition to five outstanding performers/designers/theatre companies per category instead of just one. Also, without nominees, we have no idea who’s going to be recognized, and when somebody is recognized, it’s totally confusing as to what they’re being recognized for. I just read in the Strib that awards were given out for categories such as “Overall Impact”, “Innovative Concept”, and “Emotional Impact”. But I was there…I don’t remember those categories. Was I too drunk? Fair question.
• Have A Host – Not having a host is totally gay…and not in a good way. If we have a city that’s so theatrically fantastic, get some funny fuck to host the damn thing. Instead, we have to listen to old, boring, out-of-towners who have no idea what’s going on in this scene. With nobody to tie it all together, the night gets very long.
• Don’t Cut Them Off – Why in the hell were Ivey winners getting cut off in the middle of their speeches? Was this being televised live? Do we have important commercial breaks we have to squeeze in? I could be wrong, but I don’t think so. Also, without any nominees, nobody knows that they might win. All the speeches, in theory, are totally off-the-cuff. C’mon, Iveys. It’s your fault that these people aren’t prepared.
• Fashion Show – Can somebody please explain this to me? I can still taste the bile in my mouth.
• One Comp/Company – I heard through the grapevine that the Iveys give each participating company one comp for the show. One. One single ticket. How ’bout we cut the number of roaming camera men from five to three and give every company a whopping two comps to the show. Pairs seem like they have so much more fun.
• Dominique Serrand Can Go Away Now – Serrand’s speech was just a bit too blamey for my taste. “The angels we’ve hoped for have not appeared. The powers that be have spoken with their silence.” Was he expecting somebody to show up with a big sack of money for him to blow through again? I don’t get it. You made great theatre, Dommy, but you’re a shit ton more at fault for your company’s collapse than the Twin Cities community.
• Don Stoltz – J/K Rowling. This was one of the only authentic-feeling moments of the entire night. Thank god he beat polio.
• Programs – I have no fucking clue why these existed. They served absolutely no purpose whatsoever. Dumb.
• Early Bar Close – Um…the bars inside the theatre closed right after the show started. What. The. Fuck?! This is another example of the Iveys overestimating their entertainment value. It’s a tough event to get through if you’re sober.

Sure, there’s more, but you get the picture. Did I have fun? Yeah, I think I did…but in the same way you’d have fun at the circus watching the Freak Show, or at the zoo when you catch a monkey jerking off. In conclusion, I’d definitely recommend starting a theatre company so you can get a comp to next year’s show.

Love always,

Jay

ENTERTAINERS WANTED DEJA VU NIGHT CLUB Immediate start. no contests. no dance exp nec. Indep contractor status. FT/PT. Must be 18yrs. 315 Washington Ave N. Mpls. Call 612-333-6333

Models & Actors James Pentaudi NY Agentcy Owner Int’l Scout wants to see you Saturday, Sept 27, 6pm. Call 763-746-3695 caryninternational.com

Models/Actors Mpls today: LA/ NY tomorrow. Call 763-746-3695 caryninternational.com

SKYLARK OPERA auditions for 2009 summer festival. Oct. 3-5. SkylarkOpera.org or 651-292-4309

It’s been a while, but I’m sure you all remember the drill. You will be dying on Monday as a result of too much douchebag exposure from attending this. You have 4 days left on planet Earth to see shows. Here are the 4 you should see (according to us).

THURSDAY — The Irresistible Rise of Big Daddy Ubu

This new production from our friends at Nimbus, looks to be pretty interesting. In their description, the character of Big Daddy Ubu is “a killer who’ll stop at nothing to overthrow the rival Artichoke Alliance”. So…there you go. 8pm at the Theatre Garage.

FRIDAY — Old Wicked Songs

Theater Latte Da has a knack for kicking out great productions, so I’m going to go ahead and assume that this one’s no different. You’ll have to make your way over to Guthrie Corporation (Dowling Studio) by 7:30pm to see this one. You’ll get to see another Peter Rothstein production and bask in the glow of Big Daddy Tyrone. Double score!

SATURDAY — TOUCH

Urban Samurai is one of my favorite indie companies. And after seeing their Fringe hit Musical the Musical, I’d go see Little House on the Prairie if they were somehow connected to it. Yes…I like them that much! So it comes as no surprise that your Saturday choice is TOUCH, directed by Paul Von Stoetzel, and playing over at the Cedar Riverside People’s Center (it’s back!) at 7:30pm.

SUNDAY — Vinegar Tom

Do you love Caryl Churchill? Yes, you do. Do you love Wendy Knox? Yes, you do. Do you love Frank Theatre? Yes. Yes, you do. And that, my soon-to-be-deceased friends, is why you must make this your last show before death. Sprinkle in a little Virginia Burke and a dash of Emily Gunyou Halaas, and you just can’t miss with this one. 2pm at the Ritz.

Show To See If You’d Rather Just Kill Yourself: WELLSTONE! at the Sabes JCC. Not only is this another rehash, but it’s a rehash from the most boring theatre in the Twin Cities. Plus, we already know how it ends.

So, the other day I received an email blast from History Theatre AD, Ron Peluso.  It was a nice little email informing various people about the History Theatre’s upcoming show Tyrone & Ralph, as well as a pre-show “meet the creators” ceremony, in which the theatre will honor two surviving members of the original steering committee that helped bring Guthrie Corporation to Minneapolis.

All in all, it sounds like a great idea.  Good job, History Theatre.

Then, at the very bottom of the email, Ron says this:

“In many ways, we are all ‘children of Tyrone’, so come and check out this entertaining slice of history!”

What.  The.  Fuck.  Why do theatre people feel the need to do this?  Why is it necessary to shit on a perfectly normal correspondence with insanely melodramatic nonsense?  We are all children of Tryone??  As if there would be no theatre in this major metropolitan area without Sir Tyrone Guthrie’s golden touch.  Puh-leeze.

And before I get 37 emails telling me how important the G is to the TC, let me state for the record: I’m not a moron.  Guthrie Corp. makes the TC an important destination for live theatre.  That is obvious.  But if “we are all children of Tyrone” doesn’t make you want to vomit, you need to get your gag reflex checked.

GUTHRIE CORP. Try classes @ the Guthrie Acting, singing, voice, speech, writing, Intro-advanced including a class for prof. actors taught by Raye Burke. Call 612-377-2224, or guthrietheater.org.

MORRIS PARK PLAYERS Fiddler on the Roof. Auditions September 15 and 16, 7-9pm. Callbacks September 17. Prepare 16 measures upbeat song. Dress for movement. Also needed: stage manager, costumer, set builder Folwell Middle School, 3611 20th Ave. S., Mpls. morrisparkplayers.org

GUTHRIE CORP. seeks non-union boys for roles and non-union men & women for extra roles in A CHRISTMAS CAROL. For detailed info visit guthrietheater.org/opportunities/auditions

MODEL Internet Modeling Models needed. Must be 18+ Full or part time. Make up to $2,000/wk. Call 952-457-9747 or email modeling@webcamstaffing.com To learn more visit Webcamstaffing.com

ENTERTAINERS WANTED DEJA VU NIGHT CLUB Immediate start. no contests. no dance exp nec. Indep contractor status. FT/PT. Must be 18yrs. 315 Washington Ave N. Mpls. Call 612-333-6333

STEPPINGSTONE THEATRE Needs Actors, Singers, Dancers: Boys and Girls age 8-10, 11-13. Teens 14-18 and Moms and Dads of all ages for The Best Christmas Pageant Ever. Aud. Sept. 15-16. Perf. in December. Call 651-225-9265 for appt.

STAGES Theatre Company & Mu Performing Arts casting 2 adult actors (1m/1f) to play Asian-American parents in Baseball Saved Us. Auditions October 4, 11AM by appointment only. 952-979-1115.

AEA AND NON-AEA MN Jewish Th Co casting 2 plays and 1 musical by appt. Seeking M & W ages 18-70, some roles with dance/gymnastic type movement. 651-647-4315 after Monday.

CHANCEL CHOIR DIRECTOR 30 voice choir. Rehearse Wed’s. Perf 3 Sun’s/mo. + prep 6-10 hrs./wk. Elk River United Methodist Church. Email resume to erumc@nsatel.net

Models & Actors James Pentaudi Agentcy Owner Int’l Scout wants to see you Saturday, Sept 27, 6pm. Call 763-746-3695 caryninternational.com

STAGES THEATRE COMPANY auditioning actors ages 10-21 for Peef: the Christmas Bear. Auditions September 23 & 24 by appointment only. 952-979-1135

Models/Actors Mpls today: LA/NY tomorrow. Call 763-746-3695 caryninternational.com

PRIOR LAKE PLAYERS 12 Angry Men 9/16 & 17. 7-9pm priorlakeplayers.org

Was anyone else starting to get the shakes on account of a lack of Triple Espresso in the Twin Cities? Well shake no more, ladies and gentlemen, because according to MPR, Triple Espresso is back by popular demand!!

I can still remember that fateful day when the show closed…in April. The voice of co-creator Bob Stromberg still rings in my ear with this somber quote:

“It’s going to be sad to see the signs come down off the front of the building, but things change and life goes on so we move on to other things.”

Yes…other things.

Hi, theatre people.

There’s not much happening lately. I’m searching…I really am. But nothing I see is very inspiring. So…

…nothing to do with TC theatre, but there is this, I guess.

Entertainment Staff Nickelodeon Universe and Mall of America have many exciting opportunities to be a part of during our annual Halloween event, “Nick or Treat”. Responsibilities include interacting with guests and handing out treats while costumed as different Nickelodeon characters. Previous performance/interactive experience a plus.

Must be able to work all Fridays & Saturdays from 4:00pm-10:00pm through the month of October. Costumed characters need to be 4′11″-5′7″ slim to medium build. Pay is $9.71/hr.

Auditions will be September 7th at 6pm in The Great Room at Mall of America, walk-ins welcome, call 952-883-8540 for more information. nickelodeonuniverse.com EOE

HOUSE MANAGER House and Concessions Manager The O’Shaughnessy

The O’Shaughnessy Auditorium at the College of St. Catherine, St. Paul campus, seeks a House and Concessions Mgr. ( Req. #08AM67 ) responsible for running Front of House Operations for all events held at The O’Shaughnessy. Application deadline is 9/15/08.

Visit our website at stkate.edu/hr for a complete position description and details on how to apply.

THE COLLEGE OF ST. CATHERINE 2004 Randolph Avenue St. Paul, MN 55105 EEO/ Drug Free Workplace Employer

Park Square Theatre The Diary of Anne Frank by Frances Goodrich and Albert Hackett AEA+NON Auds 9/13 6:30p-10:30p. 9/14 6:30p-10:30p Reh 1/27/09. Day & eve. Perf. run 2/16/09-5/15/06. Dir Scott Rubsam. 1W+18. Appt 9/11 11a-1p & 9/12 5p-8p: call 651-767-8491 Info. parksquaretheatre.org

AUDITIONS for Love! Valour! Compassion! at Mpls Comm & Tech College/Theatre Dept. Need 7 Men/ Age range: 20-50 Dates: 9/11 from 5-7:30pm, 9/12 from 1-3pm, and 9/13 from 12-2pm. No appts. neccessary. Bring 2 min. monologue or read from script. Call 612-659-6410 or email: Michael.Robertson@minneapolis.edu

GUTHRIE CORP. Try classes @ the Guthrie Acting, singing, voice, speech, writing, Intro-advanced including a class for prof. actors taught by Raye Burke. Call 612-377-2224, or guthrietheater.org

MORRIS PARK PLAYERS Fiddler on the Roof. Auditions September 15 and 16, 7-9pm. Callbacks September 17. Prepare 16 measures upbeat song. Dress for movement. Also needed: stage manager, costumer, set builder Folwell Middle School, 3611 20th Ave. S., Mpls. morrisparkplayers.org

GUTHRIE CORP. seeks non-union boys for roles and non-union men & women for extra roles in A CHRISTMAS CAROL. For detailed info visit guthrietheater.org/opportunities/auditions

STEPPINGSTONE THEATRE Needs Actors, Singers, Dancers: Boys and Girls age 8-10, 11-13. Teens 14-18 and Moms and Dads of all ages for The Best Christmas Pageant Ever. Aud. Sept. 15-16. Perf. in December. Call 651-225-9265 for appt.

ENTERTAINERS WANTED DEJA VU NIGHT CLUB Immediate start. no contests. no dance exp nec. Indep contractor status. FT/PT. Must be 18yrs. 315 Washington Ave N. Mpls. Call 612-333-6333

DANCE INSTRUCTORS Hiphop & jazz/lyrical/contemporary. Part-time positions, competitive pay-share your passion for dance with your students. Email or call jennifer@selectdance.com 612-986-0707.

BLUE WATER THEATRE CO in Plymouth is auditioning for Oliver! on Sept 15 & 16. Auditions open to students in grades 6-12. Performances are Dec 4-6. For more info., email info@bluewatertheatre.com

Song & Dance Instructors Needed for Theater camps & after school classes for children. Paid positions. Email tapetime@bitstream.net or call Bill 952-474-4289.

STAGES THEATRE COMPANY auditioning actors ages 10-21 for Peef: the Christmas Bear. Auditions September 23 & 24 by appointment only. 952-979-1135

THEATER LATTE DA is accepting headshots and resumes for new musical, Passage of Dreams. See tctfa.org for more info.

Models/Actors Mpls today: LA/ NY tomorrow. Call 763-746-3695 caryninternational.com

Park Square Theatre will be holding auditions for The Diary of Anne Frank on Monday, Sept. 15th from 6:30pm to 10:30pm.

Looking for one female actor, 18-25, for ANNE, one female actor, 20-35, for MEIP, and one male actor, 30-40, for MR. KRALER.

Call 651-767-8491 on Thursday, Sept. 11th between 11am and 1pm or Friday, Sept. 12th between 5pm and 8pm for an appointment.

More info can be found here.