Imagine, if you will, that you’re going to die on Monday. For some dumb-ass reason, you’d like to see one show every day until you pass on to that big audition in the sky. These are the shows we think you should see…

THURSDAY — The American Pilot

On Thursday night, you might as well get this thing going the right way by seeing The American Pilot at 7:30pm over at the Theatre Garage. You can even stay after for the post-show discussion. Oh, and if you haven’t figured it out by now, Walking Shadow does everything right all the time…and that ain’t no joke.

FRIDAY — Romeo and Juliet

Friday is Shakespeare day. Go see Four Humors‘ production of Romeo and Juliet. 8pm at the Bedlam Theater. This one looks pretty cool, plus seeing Shakespeare 3 days before you bite it looks good on your Heaven resume.

SATURDAY — Johnny Bocca’s Sex Farce for Swingin’ Lovers

Saturdays are made for funny, so you should go see Hardcover Theater’s production of Johnny Bocca’s Sex Farce for Swingin’ Lovers at 8pm over at The Playwrights’ Center. Not only will you get a good laugh in before you kick it, you’ll also get to catch a show in one of the T.C.’s best venues. It’s win-win.

SUNDAY — The Hollow

If you have to see a show on Sunday (and in this hypothetical, you do), I’d prob’ly check out The Hollow — 2pm at the Mounds Theatre. This Starting Gate production promises to be a good one. Dude…Edwin Strout.

Show To See If You’d Rather Just Kill Yourself: 42nd Street at the Chanhassen. Duh.